chzcurds.com

Gates & Brovi
3502 Monroe Street, Madison WI
Date of Curd Tasting: 13DEC2012

To set the scene: We were heading to the Monroe Street neighborhood for a Trader Joe’s run, and decided to see if the mega-crowds had died down yet at the new Gates & Brovi restaurant/pub. A drive by paid off, and it was curdz time!

Menu description:
Chz Curdz with homemade ranch

We had heard that the majority of the wood in this joint was reclaimed from an old factory in Wausau, so we had high hopes that the owners leaned toward the local, and we would not be served frozen, Sysco curdz… We asked the waitress if they curdz came from a local dairy. Her answer: “I know they come from Wisconsin, but I don’t know which dairy”. She did not offer to find out.

Gates & Brovi Curdz

Taste…4
These are some seriously flavorful curdz. HappySchnapps had to pause with a comment: “It’s sinful that I’m doing this without a beer.” (The iced tea was delicious, FYI). He persevered, and we continued with the review. Given our penchant for curd purity, these curdz were borderline overly herby with some sort of Herbs de Provence-ish mix in the breading, however the combo with the chz was rather delightful, and warranted high tasty points. Quite chewy, fresh curdz. Very enjoyable.

The Stretch

Color…orange
As per the stretch.

Greazy Curdz

Greaziness…3
We postulated that the curdz were likely left in the fryer a bit too long…this was evidenced by the increased greaze factor and the occasional curd explosion. It was a bit of a Catch 22 as the lengthened fry time also resulted in a captivating crispiness to the curd coating.

Hollow Curd

Breading…4
A light and crunchy breading. It’s lovely golden hue was a sight to behold. As previously mentioned, the over frying resulted in a bit of chz bleed, and therefore sporadic hollow curd phenomenon. We decided to blame the cook, and not the breading.

Thick Ranch

Condiment…Ranch
Homemade per the menu description. “So thick that you can sit on it!”. Well, a curd could anyway…and did. Usually we prefer a thin ranch, however this was seriously scrumptious and paired well with the herby breading.

Value…4
Slightly smallish order, but refreshingly priced at $5.25. A perfect size for two. They would be good for a crowd if you order them along with a few of the numerous other awesome sounding appetizers on the menu (eg. shrimpf fritters, fried artichoke hearts, antipasto relish, beer steamed shrimpf!)

Total…15
These curdz went YUM. If properly executed, they would be a serious home run. Frying curdz is definitely an art, with a very small window of success for our perfectionist palates. It was a decent curd experience, and we were more than content with the curdz ingested. The joint is pretty cool, and all the food we ate was delish, including the curdz. We’ll be back for sure, and next time we will try them with beer!

The Great Dane
123 East Doty Street, Madison WI
Date of Curd Tasting: 10NOV2012

To set the scene: Family and friends had gathered to celebrate a rather momentous Cheezaholic birthday, and the big dog was the starting point of the night’s festivities. When one of the party goers ordered the curdz, we couldn’t resist our first group curd review.

Menu description:
Beer-battered Chz Curdz. Over one-half pound of Wisconsin’s favorite–beer-battered white cheddar chz curdz–crispy fried and served with a side of Ranch dressing.

Since it was an impromptu curd review that came in to being after the curdz were already served, we had failed to ask our waiter if the curdz originated at a local dairy. The Saturday night crowd was getting to him, and we didn’t see much of him after that, so the question never got posed. Oh well.

Great Dane Curdz

Taste…3.5
We solicited comments from around the table:

• Pretty average.
• Tastes ok.
• Appropriately salty.
• Could be saltier.
• Kind of blah.

Not exactly a rave review from the crowd. We concurred.

The Stretch

Color…white
As per menu description.

Greaziness…4.5
Good execution on the frying. Adequately greazy.

Hollow Curd

Breading…2.5
This is where the curdz really fell short. The breading is quite thick, and causes a gummy feel on the tongue. Rather corn-doggy in nature. We tallied up three instances of hollow curd phenomenon.

The Dip

Condiment…Ranch
A generic flavored ranch. Rather Hidden Valleyish. Nice and thin, with good curd coating capabilities. Nothing special, much like the curdz.

Value…3
The menu said it was a half-pound order, priced at $8.00. The order did not seem very large to us, and it was hard to justify the ocho.

Total…13.5
Don’t get us wrong, we love the Great Dane. Schnapps took a beer brewing class from the Brew Master. We fondly reminisced at the table about Cheezaholic’s Pharm Fraternity banquet at The Fess Hotel (the historic building in which the big dog is now housed). We frequent the Dane often, and will continue to do so. It pained us to rate their curdz as run of the mill, but so it must be. If you are looking for an app at the Dane, we highly recommend the Chz & Artichoke dip, the Tuna Tataki and the Juicy Brewskis (brat patty sliders), but pass on the curdz (unless someone else is buying, of course!).

The Free House Pub
1902 Parmenter St, Middleton, WI
Date of Curd Tasting: 21AUG2012

To set the scene: Have we really gone through the whole summer without a curdz review? Inconceivable! Dallas & Hungry Hippo were in town from TX for the annual August birthday visit, and we were determined to find some good curdz for HH. His previous fried curdz exposure included the run-of-the-mill Harmony curdz, and the not-even-worth-our-time Gritty curdz. We’ve tried, on multiple occasions, to check out the new Free House Pub just down the road from our house, but it has always been too packed!  Their tasty sounding curdz were beckoning us, so we gave em another shot.

Menu description:
Wisconsin chz curdz. Wisconsin cheddar curds fried to perfection and served with a side of buttermilk ranch.

We asked our server, Preston with the flowing, curly blond locks, which dairy the curds came from. He did not know, but offered to “Pop in to the kitchen and take a peek.”. He quickly returned with this quizzical report: “They are from Westby?? Not sure if you have heard of it??” Well, of course we have! We are quite familiar with Westby and their delicious chz, thanks to our friend Hunter. (See Church Key curdz review). “Preston, kind sir. We shall have one order of your fine Westby curdz, if you please.”

Free House Curdz

Taste…4.5
Well, my oh my. These were quite delicious. Schnapps wondered if our opinion was skewed due to the extended amount of time since we had last partaken of a curd. He felt compelled to dock 0.5 to accommodate the curd drought confusion. HH noted the high level of saltiness, but was pleased to learn the proper technique to offset this taste sensation: BEER. Salt level was definitely on the high end, but since Cheezaholic tends toward the salty, all was well

Chz Bleed

Color…orange
Classic orange cheddah.

Grz Puddle

Greaziness…4
An appropriate grz presence. Most of it stayed on the wax paper. We were left with quite a puddle.

Hollow Curd

Breading…3.5
The breading had hints of excellence. Lovely golden beer batter with the perfect brown bits. Perhaps they were fried a touch too long, which resulted in several instances of chz bleed, and even a few hollow curdz. We both blurted out 3.5 at the same time. We laughed as HH compared our grading scale to old school Olympic gymnastics judging. No rhyme, nor reason but the judges all agree. We wanted to rate this breading higher, but unfortunately it didn’t stick the landing, and bled its chz all over the mat.

Ranchy

Condiment…Buttermilk Ranch
A very nice, thin, yummy ranch with perfect curd coating capabilities.

Value…4.5
Average sized order, priced at $6.50. The curdz were yummy, and worth the moola.

Total…16.5
These curdz go wonderfully with good company, and good beer. We recommend ordering them with any of the many local beers that the Free House has on tap. We do not recommend them with the local Bourbon that they offer…have you ever had a “white bourbon”? Don’t. HH accidentally had two. Who would of thought there would be two clear, colorless, local bourbons on the menu?!? The Free House is a cool new joint. We’ll be hanging out there regularly as Schnapps finishes his new book: “I’m Still Working on that Pickle, and Other Tales”, and for sure will be ordering the curdz again!

Graze
1 South Pinckney St, Madison, WI
Date of Curd Tasting: 05MAY2012

To set the scene: We had just completed our first Farmer’s Market adventure of the year, and after partaking of fresh curdz, decided to attempt the unthinkable: two curdz reviews in one day! Graze curdz had been recommended to us, and since neither of us had ever eaten there, they were up.

Menu description:
Fried Sassy Cow chz curdz. vodka batter, house ranch.

Curd Garnish

No need to ask if they were local curdz, as the answer was in the name. We had previously reviewed Sassy Cow fresh curdz, and they are our #1 “go-to” milk variety, so hopes were high. Excitement increased upon receipt of a bloody mary which included a very large curd garnish.

Graze Curdz

Taste…5
Very yummy! Wonderfully sweet and salty. Amazing elasticity, speaking to the freshness of the curdz.

Mouth to Hand Stretch

Elasto-Chz

Color…orange
No question about it.

Grzy Fingerz

Greaziness…3.5
A bit on the greazy side. Made us giggle that the restaurant should be renamed Greaze instead of Graze.

Chz Bleed

Breading…4
Crispy and light, in spite of the greaze. Yummy brown bits. There were several instances of major chz bleed, which forced us to dock a point off the score. But overall we were quite pleased with the breading!

Ranchy

Condiment…House Ranch
Definitely a unique, house made ranch. Rather herby. Thicker than we typically prefer for curd coating, but very tasty. The cute bowl impacted the enjoyment as well.

Ambiance

Value…3.5
Average sized order, for a big $8.00. Everything on the menu is rather overpriced, and the curdz are no exception. You pay for the gorgeous view of the capitol.

Giant Curdz Remain

Total…16
Pretty good score, putting Graze curdz into the Curdz that go YUM category. We ran in to the same issue with the fried Sassy Cow Curdz as we did with the fresh Sassy Cow Curdz. They are simply too large, which makes chewing increasingly difficult as you get through the order, compounded by the grz factor, in this case. We had to stop before finishing the order, which impacted their value score. However, they were definitely fresh and delicious, and would be recommended for a group, but not a duo.

AJ Bombers
201 West Gorham St, Madison, WI
Date of Curd Tasting: 30March2012

To set the scene: There was a geocache on State Street that we were overdue to search for, a newer burger joint that HappySchnapps hadn’t tried yet, and it had been over a month since our last curdz review. AJ Bombers was up to bat.

Menu description:
Wisconsin cheddar chz curdz. Fried WI cheddar curdz served with chipotle ranch.

Cheezaholic asked the waitress if she knew the name of the WI dairy from whence the curdz came. Her response: “Ooooooh. I know it starts with an E! Elk something? Elkhorn? Do you guys know of any curd places that start with E? Oh! Ellsworth! I think that’s it!” Perhaps the Ellsworth Cooperative Creamery? Proclaimed as the Chz Curds capitol of the world in 1984 by then Governor Anthony Earl.

AJ Bombers Curdz

Taste…4.5
Extreme yumminess. Flavorful and perfectly salty. Nice and chewy, so obviously we were dealing with some seriously fresh curdz.

White Cheddah

Color…white
Pure white cheddah.

Puddle of Grz

Greaziness…3
The curdz were sitting in a puddle-O-grz. Finger tips remained shiny throughout the curdfest.

Limp Curdz

Breading…3.5
A nice thin beer batter, but not crispy at all. A rather unappetizing pale color, rather than a tasty looking golden brown. The breading was totally saturated with greaz which resulted in a sad, flaccid curd.

Chipotle Ranch

Condiment…Chipotle Ranch
Not a fan. Overpowering and spicy. Didn’t seem like it went with curdz at all.

Value…4
Only $4.50, but it was a fairly small order. We were left wanting more.

Total…15
If it wasn’t for the poor execution during the frying of the curdz, which resulted in a grzfest, these could be truly great. The taste is excellent, and they have great potential. They’d be worth another shot. We’ll likely be heading back to AJ Bomber’s, as Schnapps was quite pleased with his three-napkin, double-chz burger!

Gray’s Tied House
950 Kimball Lane, Verona, WI
Date of Curd Tasting: 24February2012

To set the scene: The Badger Women’s hockey team was hosting a WCHA tourney game at the Eagle’s Nest in Verona, so we decided to head out to the outer burbs for some curdz and a game.

Menu description:
Beer Battered Chz Curds. Fresh cheddar nuggets dipped in our homemade beer batter and served with ranch dressing.
Cheezaholic asked the waiter if they came from a local dairy. He didn’t know, but offered to go find out if we’d like. We would like. He came back with this informative answer: “Yes, they do come from Wisconsin”. Then, sheepishly with a smirk: “That’s all I got.”

Gray's Curdz

Taste…4.5
Very fresh tasting curdz. Gooey and quite yummy. Their high saltiness level resulted in the ordering of two waters. Slight essence of fish fryness.

Orange Curdz

Color…orange
The classic.

Grzy Fingers

Greaziness…3.5
Resulted in quite a bit of greaze on the fingers, and we had to request extra napkins.

Conjoined Curd, Exhibit A

Conjoined Curd, Exhibit B

Crunchy Nubbins

Breading…3.5
Tasty beer batter, but so thin to the point that you only get the mouth feel of melty chz, no breading. No crispiness to speak of, besides the large pile of crunchy nubbins left on the plate. Several instances of conjoined curd, but not due to chz bleed. It appeared to be due to an embryonic conjoining during the battering process. Very unusual phenomenon.

Ranchy

Condiment…Ranch
Tasty and homemade.

Value…3
Awfully pricey at $7.95. Medium sized order.

Total…15.5
These curdz were very reminiscent of a traditional state fair fried curdz which resulted in immediate waves of happiness. However the extreme richness of the chz (due to the extremely small breading to chz ratio) caused us to prematurely cease eating them, and resulted in a bee line back home to the couch, rather than to the originally planned hockey game. We appear to be on curd overload after three straight weeks of reviews, but once we can peel our butts up off the couch, we will definitely be recommending Gray’s curdz.

Mulligan’s Bar & Grill
S944 Christmas Mountain Road, WI Dells
Date of Curd Tasting: 17February2012

To set the scene: Chz & Schnapps missed the extended Cheezaholic family holiday gathering 2011 since it was their year to head to the Schnapps fam in the northwoods. Several Cheezaholic cousins (& an Auntie) had a time share weekend in the Christmas “Mountain” resort, which prompted an impromptu Fish Fry/Chz Curd review dinner in the Dells to make up for Chz & Schnapps missing the real Christmas celebration.

Menu description: Wisconsin Chz curds. Do not leave town without trying these,
or you’ll be sorry! Served with marinara sauce.
Cheezaholic asked the waitress if the curdz came from a local dairy. She didn’t know, and did not offer to go find out.

Mulligan’s Curdz

Taste…3.5
Appropriately salty, very crunchy. Chz was hot and melty. Multiple curd sizes. Poor chz to breading ratio, so that overpowered the taste sensation. Birthday-girl-Cheezaholic-cousin was less than impressed and had this to say: “I taste oil first” and “Not good when it makes it around a table of nine people and there are still some left!” [To be fair, for some reason the entire extended Cheezaholic family appeared to be on a diet with the exception of toddler Milo]

Orange Chz

Color…orange
The classic.

Chzy

Greaziness…4
Could have actually used a bit more grz. B-day girl chimed in again: “They’re not grzy to the touch, they’re grzy to the taste!”

Hollow Curd

Breading…3
Very thick, crumbly and corn-meally rather than beer-battery. Occasional hollow curd phenomenon, and much to the delight of Auntie, several instances of chz bleed causing conjoined curd syndrome. “Oooooh! Look-it! I got 3 in 1!”

Condiment…marinara and ranch
Nobody touched the marinara. The ranch was average. When offered to Milo, he emphatically declined with a loud “No dip it!”

Value…2.5
Small order, big price at $7.00. We were in a resort in the Dells, full of FIBs. They’ll pay anything for real WI chz.

Total…13
Meh. They were ok.  Run of the mill, fer sure. Definitely not worth the inflated price. However, Milo was quite pleased with his first foray into the world of curdz. As his Papa so eloquently put it: “Why WOULDN’T deep fried chz make you happy?” The little one repeatedly requested “MILO CHZ CURDZ!”. Finally, there were only a pair of curdz remaining on the plate.

Milo’s mama: Milo, do you want one more?
Milo: Two?

Ahhh, a new generation of chz curd lovers is born.